21.1.09

autoFoodLEXICography

As my last ruminative blog, this one will hopefully be the most fun. Out of all the over 70,000 words that I have written on autoFOODography, a very select handful are actually not words. They are not in the Oxford or Webster dictionaries or on dictionary.com (or at least not with the meaning I implied). Most of them are my own words or plays on words, something that I have had an affinity for my entire life. This is a lexicography (or dictionary) of all the non-words that I have covertly or not-so-covertly tried to pass off to you as actual prose. Let me know your favorites in comments!

awesomest – (adjective) the most awesome; the most spectacular and incredible

begger – (adjective) the characteristic of being larger than something else and also eggier simultaneously

bursted – (verb) to have caused the implosion of an object, most often one filled with another substance

caramelization – (noun) the caramelized bits of food that stick to the bottom of the pan when sautéing and add tremendous flavor to dishes and sauces when unstuck using acid to deglaze

carb-ful – (adjective) the characteristic of an item of food being filled with empty (or refined) carbohydrates, thus ironically being filled with emptiness

cheddarean – (adjective) the characteristic of cheddar acting as if it were parmesan

cheffing – (noun) all the skills and abilities one might hope to master within the domain of culinary arts

cupcakeries – (plural noun) bakeries that specialize in cupcakes

eggists – (plural noun) all those true egg lovers and egg cooking aficionados

emptyish – (adjective) being actually or practically empty or nearly so, as in a fridge that is either actually empty or lacking enough enticing items to be considered sufficiently full

facon/fakon – (noun) vegetarian bacon made out of soy

feastette – (noun) from my Mom, a feast-like, often themed, occasion that is not quite as large as a feast in size or scale

frankenfood – (noun) a food that either is or can be analogized to a combination of the best traits of multiple foods to create a single super-food

friedness – (noun) the degree to which something is fried or crispy

greekly – (adverb) having to do with Greek culture and/or cuisine, most notably yogurt and Gods

guesstures – (plural noun) guesses that are just slightly mixed with posture and estimation; in other words, times when the cook has no real clue as to what he/she is doing or getting themselves and their readers into

horseradishy – (adjective) the characteristic of having either strong or subtle overtones or undertones of horseradish or Dijon mustard

impartings – (plural noun) multiple, often incessant, passages of knowledge, opinions or nonsense

Indianesque – (adjective) having characteristics that are trying very hard to be similar to those of the country of India, but often failing miserably and only hinting at the original

lunchy – (adjective) showing the characteristics most often associated with lunch, in reference to American restaurants, due to the presence of items like the soup, sandwich and/or salad on its menu

luxuriouslydelicious – (adjective) a taste that is so refined, exotic and exquisite that a simple "delicious" certainly needs something extra in order to describe the sensation

mis-timing – (noun) the act of failing to properly time a culinary endeavor, like an egg, such that it turns out undercooked, overcooked, broken or otherwise unpleasant to eat

mozz – (noun) a shortened, affectionate name for fresh mozzarella

noodly – (adjective) the characteristic of a starch being moist and pliable yet still have noticeable constitution

onionesque – (adjective) to show the characteristic taste and/or texture of the onion without in fact being an onion

overeasies – (plural noun) a pet name for over easy eggs by true eggists

Pretz – (noun) an affectionate, truncated nickname for the pretzel, especially when it is associated with OJ

pubby – (adjective) showing the characteristics most often associated with a pub, in reference to eateries, due to the presence of items like grilled food, deep fried food, beer and wings on its menu

Revi-oo – (noun) a review of a bottle of olive oil (OO) or other item that rhymes with “review” in full or abbreviated form, especially with the initials O-O

richeners – (plural noun) an ingredient or other device that is used primarily to add a deepness in flavor, color or texture to a dish or other experimental amalgamation

risottoesque – (adjective) trying very hard to be like risotto but failing miserably, or in best case, ending up very far away

scrambleds – (plural noun) a pet name for scrambled eggs by true eggists

skewerable – (adjective) the characteristic of an item of food have an amicable size, shape, texture and moisture level for use in presentations or cooking methods that work best when the ingredients are placed on skewers

sliderized – (participle) a dish or menu item that has been transformed, most often for an appetizer, tasting or exemplar, into a small sandwich version of it's once larger and more inspired self

Slidertown – (proper noun) a certain neighborhood in the District of Columbia known for its fine restaurants, but more so for the restaurants' collective affinity for passing off sliders as versions of nice dishes

snobhood – (noun) the generalized doctrinal verification that makes all snobs so characterized and recognized

snobness – (noun) the actions and characteristics that embody a snob

spatulaed – (verb) to use the spatula in culinary endeavors to perform a difficult but crucial maneuver, such as flipping an egg or a pancake

sunnies – (plural noun) a pet name for Sunny-Side-Up eggs by true eggists

sweeted – (verb, alt) the act of bringing out the sweetness of an entity

tacoesque – (adjective) having all the characteristics of tacos regardless of whether the actual form is that of tacos

tapicocoa – (noun) chocolate tapioca pudding

toastadas – (plural noun) corn tortillas that are crisped via dry, oven toasting as opposed to oiled pan or deep frying

whatevers – (plural noun) multiple unidentifiable or unclassifiable items, most notably in new and unknown cooking endeavors

whazz – (verb) from the British chef Jamie Oliver, to blend, process or do any other culinary mutilation process vigorously

whole-wheaty – (adjective) the characteristic of being composed or comprised of flour or other grains that are nearly or fully whole grain or unrefined; often utilized to describe any high fiber food

wroate – (verb) to write, especially in reference to what one has eaten

zay – (verb) to say, especially in regards to the DC restaurant Zaytinya



PS And not to worry, back to the regular material for now in the next entry – these last 3 have taken me too long! Enjoy!

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